As one of those unlearned juveniles, I've taught to aim for learning as a pleasure in my life.

Knowing more has favorably blossomed my range of understanding, but has not yet flourished my life.

Has not yet contributed me with lucrative job, nor , however, lavished the exercises of my redundant energy,

it is not my wisdom that might have guided my ways and behaviors.

Pursuit of knowledge, that it was, and not yet satisfactory.


Regarding I am not living for ever, ever since I was determined to go for it,

indeed I should endorse my way of life.


And it undoubtedly will take more than I will be probably able to afford.

It takes not only time and energy, but also chances and opportunities.

Like an undefeated horror -I think it is the death absolutely - life slowly suffocates my throat.

Inward concentration, as an automate defense, clears out these thoughts of my mind.


Listen, what my head says, and also listen what my mind tells to myself.

Vaguely ... it is nothing.


I thought it would be felt like it once I die.

I chewed over the illation I could've concluded

... and was determined to live simply.

I won't be the same dick-head who's gonna embrace everything within my sloppy arms.

It's just a fragile day. I hate this fucking introspection.

It always starts with a bunch of headaches, and ends with ambiguous optimism. haha